Crosses

How do I silence
The tugging heart strings
the tickling sadness
the fleeting joy.
How do I quiet
the repressed longing
the remembered images
that play through my head.
How do I mediate
this battle raging inside
when I am both sides of the war.
This lake of unspoken confusion and emotions
damned by martyred morals
and past experience.
All threatening to overflow
with tidal waves.
Crushing you and I below.
Why does this have to be my cross to bear
Again.
I can't speak it
my voice is frozen.